Have you ever felt that anxiousness....
The one that reaches into the pit of your stomach and rips it into your heart?
Grabs a hold of your lungs and doesn't let you breath the same until time heals it?
The one that keeps you up all night thinking about what you've done so wrong,
When truly and honestly, you've done nothing....?

Sleep is the only thing I want to do lately.
I should probably be sleeping right now.
That is the only thing that can take my mind off of everything.
At least I can breath in and out without the chills you get before you cry.
Sometimes, crying is the best thing to do.
But, I am fed up and tired of crying.

So I sleep.....



I feel so empty without the perfection.
I keep praying and praying that all of this will just float away and everything will be perfect again.
Maybe that makes me stupid for praying for perfection.
Most say perfection doesn't exist...but you all know you have your own sense of it.
I have felt it before and now I can't live without it.
Perfection has become my anti-bullshit.
I know you have felt the feeling of perfection and peace.
When your mind is in safe mode. Nothing can touch you and you won't allow it to.



It's funny how a we as people KNOW there are things that could be so much better in our lives but, we won't let ourselves realize until we finally break down. When you finally let yourself wake up and realize what's so wrong...you break down. Don't even know what to say or think, but you constantly think about the nothingness that suddenly means everything to you at that very moment.